The Clear Horizon

From oblivion of alcoholism into the light of sobriety

  • Horror RPG Journaling and the practical use of fiction in mental health remedy

    I think I have reached another waymark in the process of my recovery, and this time it seems to be a more complex one. My stay at the sea has condensed a couple of interesting thoughts regarding cosmic horror, philosophical horror, the disorders in my individual system as well as the self awareness and what… Read more

  • The sea, insignificance and the healing touch of philosophical Horror

    My mind normally hates idleness, because it forces thoughts into my mind that may spiral out of control. I discussed that earlier. But being at the sea and finding solace in the sublime and infinity of the horizon gives my mind rest to find productivity in idleness: Ever heard of Thomas Ligotti? No? Well, you… Read more

  • The sea, feeling of infinity, and Cthulhu

    I promised to myself to get to the sea at least once a year. Interestingly, the sea has always delivered on the promise to grant me solace, the feeling of sublime and the feeling of infinity. This is nothing I want to comment too deeply upon. Only that by the sea everything becomes so perfectly… Read more

  • Do it only for 5 Minutes… Why overcoming the motivational obstacle is one of the biggest issue with Habits in ADHD

    Shall I really write today? Ok, but I’ll do it only for five minutes. This was exactly my thinking when I was typing today’s post. I was unmotivated like I wasn’t unmotivated in a long time. Maybe it has to do with the fact that I was pretty idle today and in the evening I… Read more

  • COVID and Alcohol – what boredom has to do with drinking

    It wasn’t the stress that made me drink more than before in the COVID – era. This is an interesting insight, because I always thought that I had a very stressful time during COVID. Yes, it was stressful. I had a lot of remote home schooling, I had shifts of emergency childcare at the school… Read more

  • extreme choices, extreme emotions – how to cope without a single drop of rum?

    Sometimes it’s hard to determine (in terms of heartfelt instances) if living in extremes was there before alcohol or the other way around: When I quit drinking, my hope was, a bit, to leave the life of dichotomous choices or emotional spikes and dips, a life of black-and-white thinking, whatever you may want to call… Read more

  • Keeping the Beast Alive – why feeding my system from the outside is important

    Will I ever find an end in this journey? Probably not. The good thing about this, though, is the fact that I have control of the pace and the length of this journey. As far as I am concerned, there is still a lot to dive into, and the road is still a long and… Read more

  • My life is like a mobile

    No…not like a phone. Well, sometimes maybe, but this is not what I mean. I mean the kind of kinetic art sculpture you can hang from a ceiling with dangling parts on different levels. And this is what my life is like. Actually, it is an image that we use a lot in systemic pedagogy… Read more

  • The Fast Forward Button

    Fast For…what? Those of you familiar with the notion “cassette player”, “VCR” or other mechano-audiovisual devices will remember a button which was called the Fast Forward Button. For those who have not grown up to use these relics of times long past: It was meant to give you the opportunity to quickly – or, fast… Read more

  • deconstruction, stripping down and recombining different and seemingly opposite mindsets to form new ones.

    A complicated title to this blog. What I mean is the following: Remember the seemingly nonsensical BS I wrote yesterday? Very good. If your brain works like mine (which is not very probable) you might even make sense of the Mumbo-Jumbo I wrote yesterday. And that was only the practical application. Today I would like… Read more